I started a new devotional today.

The topic for today was:

You are loved…no, really.

Hmmmm.

I’m already spinning about how I’ve always sought approval or love in some kinda way. Maybe a people pleaser too. A yes girl. Wanting to do what others want to be loved or accepted.

I thought I had gotten over being “that person”.

In many ways I have.

By the gift of God’s grace.

Prayer.

Finding strength in Him.

Reading today’s words, I kinda stumbled. Fell upon the picture of me still needing to “make sure” I’m loved.

I “know” my husband loves me.

I “know” my kids love me.

But I find myself seeking out, making sure, looking for ways…

Mannnnnn.

No wonder I feel so empty.

I “know” there’s only one love that can fill those voids I seek to fill with other’s love and approval.

One love that can fill the loneliness, the emptiness, the desire to be loved.

Why can’t I accept it?

Love?

Any of it?

God’s.

My husband’s?

Friends?

My children’s?

Family?

God’s?

Even when I hear I love you, in the back of my mind, I question it, I wonder, I wonder if they really mean it.

I wonder if God really means it.

I wonder if spending countless time chasing the love and approval of my earthly father has anything to do with my reluctance to accept and the unending need to feel approval and feel wanted?

I wonder why do I “know“ the truth about Christ’s love, yet still shy away, reject and continue to feel unloved?

I wonder why?

Why would God love me?

Grace is something else.

Thank you God for your grace.

Thank you for your word, that stands alone, that is right in front of me, that I can read, to “know” your truth.

Verses like these:

Philippians 4:13 ESV

I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

Psalm 94 18-19 ESV

18When I thought “my foot slips”, your steadfast love, O Lord, held me up. 19When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul.

These verses also grabbed my attention this morning. Ephesians3:14-19(ESV)

Prayer for Spiritual Strength

14 For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, 15 from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, 16 that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, 18 may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, 19 and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.

If you read Ephesians, you’ll find this as one of the letters Paul wrote to the churches of Ephesus.

I find it a comforting prayer.

A prayer to remain in humble adoration. A prayer to be strengthened through His spirit. Because as Christians, He already lives in us, because we believed. We had faith. We have faith. Being rooted and standing firm in His love, we can have the strength to comprehend, comprehend the incomprehensible, the unending depth of His love. The east to the west. To know His love surpasses all we know. All we think we know. All we can comprehend. It’s that big.

How can you not stand up and be strong in that?

You are loved.

We are loved.

Grace.

Being taught by grace.

By faith.

In the truth that I am loved.

As I am.

As I am, I am accepted in His love.

I am forgiven.

Adopted.

Welcomed.

Born again.

Even when I don’t love myself.

Through His work.

Not mine.

Grace.

Thank you God for your grace.

Give Grace.

Give Grace A Hug❤️